All alone, and left with my thoughts. I doubt anyone cares. I cry often, begging God for finality, and
ease of anguish. Despair, disdain and
desperation begin to set in. I wonder
what my purpose in life is, and will it reveal itself in time. My sadness is
real, my loneliness is real, and my emotional downward spiral is REAL!
I have no one to turn
to; no one takes my heartache and pain serious.
My furtive calls for help fall upon deaf ears. The earliest I can speak with someone professionally
is ninety days, when I need to speak with someone now. Will anyone listen before its too late?
When all is done, there will be many who will come to see
me, who will cry for me, who will have distant fond memories of me, but I’m not
fooled. They never cared. If they cared, they would have been with me
before my departure. Talking to me,
consoling me, uplifting me, holding me, telling me they love me, and I have
nothing to fear. WHERE WERE
YOU?!?!? The lights and the fire are
out, too late for your words of comfort and kindness that you stand on the podium
to recite. It’s stuffy, dark and tight
in here, but I hear you all weep. The pastor reads his scripture, the flowers
are thrown, the dirt is shoveled, and those who have grieved and mourned my passing are now leaving to go back to living their
lives. It is forever, the end of my
sadness….
*This post is NOT about me, but I do understand some aspects of
this writing. At times I'm sad, cry and
speak with God on various issues.
However, there are people who follow through with suicide due to lack of
resources or we don’t see the signs.
Please try to be aware of the signs, and be willing to help….
